No slacking! What, you think because you are having a good day that you get to just bask in the sun!!! NO! There's no time to keep your arms crossed and sitting on your butt! You've got work to do!

This is when you have to make the most out of this moment of clarity. By "moment" I don't mean your are only going to feel ok for a couple minutes, I mean that this moment could only last a couple hours, maybe even a whole day, but I hope this moment lasts a few days, for your sake.

Right now, yes this very second, do something! Start strength training your brain! Right now that you are not being consumed by feelings and negative thoughts, is when you need to teach yourself how to keep it that way as long as you can!

 You will accomplish more right now if you start. It might be hard to concentrate but have to do your best. Being able to take control of your Depression depends on your willingness to change what's happening to you.

The negative people are not going to go away. How you feel about them and what the say or do, can go away. You don't have to be offended, you don't have to believe what they say. Why is it that for some reason when someone says kind things to you choose to believe that, you don't have to. There have been time when you didn't believe something nice someone said about you. You know what I'm talking about. Like when someone once told you that you are beautiful/handsome....you said thank you but the first thought in your head was saying the opposite! That is you choosing to disregard the positive thing they just told you. So why can't you chose to disregard the negative things told to us?

If you really felt you were a loser, that there's nothing worth living for, that there is no meaning to your life, that you will always be alone, nobody cares, you were meant to suffer...then you wouldn't be reading this would you! You'd be in an institution on suicide watch!

Deep down inside us we are instilled with the desire to live. The desire to learn and seek more knowledge. To explore and find things to do that make us feel alive. I'm not saying you have to be a thrill seeker, just that we weren't meant to veg out on the couch or seclude ourselves in our rooms.

So the point is that you do want to live, you just don't want to live in your current situation. You are alone, but that's because you won't leave your house or be open to help from those who are being supportive. There is meaning to life, you just have no motivation to find out what that is. People do care, that why I write my blog and others find other ways to help each other! And you are a loser if you refuse to help yourself, expecting everyone else to drop what they are doing to rescue you. And you will suffer if that what you believe you were meant for. That mentality will be your ball and chain.

Just like you can take to heart my words or dismiss them as you read each sentence, it all is up to you. It's your choice to believe me if you think there is any truth in my words or you could choose to be offended by my lack of sugar coating things, or you could just assume that everything I write about is unattainable but somehow it magically worked for me!

What ever your opinion, it's your choice, I can't choose for you, no one else can. Choosing means having the power to change something for yourself.

If you really think you have no power to control your own life or choose what to believe or choose how you will let things affect you, then fine, I will choose for you. I will take the power you are giving up and now with that power I'm going to tell you that you are really a leprechaun. That on your search for the pot of gold at the end of a rainbow you lost your way and ended up were you are now!

Did it work? Please tell me it worked! Please tell me I was able to turn you into a two foot tall little guy in a green outfit!!

Of course it didn't work. That's because I cannot make you something you are not. Not only do you not believe me but hopefully you see the point. It would be absolutely ridiculous to even have tried to believe me! So why would you believe anything ridiculous that anyone else tells you? Just like right now you chose to not believe you are a leprechaun, you have a choice to be, act and believe what you want to!

YOU HAVE A CHOICE. YOU CHOOSE. YOU HAVE CHOSEN, SO NOW WHAT WILL YOU BE CHOOSING??????

Keep Silent!

Sometimes silence is the greatest source of power!

For as much as you would like to defend yourself and prove your innocence, there are times when the fight is pointless. More often than not, our opponent has no control over his/her own words, emotions, and actions.

In these cases, why waste your energy on such a person! The moment you start to blurt out your defense, in the intensity of the moment you are likely to say a few things you hadn't meant to. Not only that but, have you seen a person argue by themselves? It's funny! They get so mad because the are failing to get a reaction out of you! They feel powerless. And once they see you are not falling for their drama, the feel ridiculous, which usually cause them so become very angry!!

I find this amusing. Is that mean?!

I feel like, the more you keep your mouth shut, even though you have done nothing wrong and you really want to clear your good name, by saying nothing, you are filled with all this power. So much that even your chest is held out high for not letting out one word! But the second you waste your time defending yourself to meaningless argument by a meaningless person, you start to deflate like a balloon. Congratulations, you just became meaningless too!

The chances of that person believing you in the first place are really low anyway. Why bother correcting people like that. You know the truth and that's enough. If a person does not want to accept all the truths about you, they can go find people full of lies so that their accusations, claims, judgments and opinions can be made true!


Don't do it, don't feed the flame. If that person feels the need to attack you and is incapable of seeing the truth, then they don't deserve to have you in the first place! Consider the source! Monkey see monkey do. You don't have to be a monkey, that's all I'm saying!

Let the monkey act like one, when it sees you not partaking in the ridiculous behavior, it will go find other monkeys to act like a fool with!

You on the other hand, act like a mature human being and you will attract the same type of people in your life!




Thought of the day:

No monkey business!



Dr. Nobody

Get your control back!
Did you now that people, things, or past events only have control over us because have yet to make a decision! Yep, if it's a person who seems to have control over you, it's only because you are unsure of your own decisions, fear the reaction of that person should you gain your freedom back, and strangely, you are mistaking their control over you for guidance. You feel that, even though they are a pain to deal with, they still look after you, protect you. The truth, though is that they are really doing you more harm. But you aren't quite sure of what to do, you might know what you should do, but you have not made up your mind. So until you do, they will always have control over you!

If it's a thing controlling you, like a vice or phobia, you have not made a decision. Believe it or not, when a person "decides" to do something, there is a whole lot going on in your mind, heart and body. First, your mind a chosen and has weighed the options and 98% sure. Then your heart/feelings(1%) start to change. You become confidant and your feelings start to show on your face and you might even adjust your posture, and that's the body accepting your decision (1%). The end result is that you just fed your soul. It feels so great to make a decision, express yourself, and be satisfied and proud of your decision!

When a memory has control over you, you have not come to terms with what has happened. Not only that but you also are harboring negative feelings about the memory and how it made you feel at that time. You are stuck on the past. It is the most powerful control out there. Control over the mind. What are the chance if you are keeping something negative, that you become negative? It doesn't really make sense to keep holding the "hot potato", does it! Toss it!

Like I said, though, this is the toughest one. A person can stay in your life or leave it if you want. A vice or fear can be easily conquered. But for something that happened to you which the memory of destroys you, it take a whole lot of courage to stand up to it!

But it will always be there to inflict the same pain, until you DECIDE it will no longer!

So to help you decide: Be ok with how it made you feel. Don't ever be ashamed of how you feel or felt. Own up to it. Your feeling are precious and they make up the billions of personalities that make us all unique! But what are your actions after the fact? That's what needs regulating.

You decide how you react so that your actions give you no fault. Decide. We are given free will, so use it to your benefit!



Always

Dr. Nobody

Today is a big day for you! I bet you didn't even know it! Yes, today you have a major decision to make!

Did you know that everyday when you wake up, you have Control? The very moment you open those eyes, before any thoughts come into your head and reflect on your feeling, you have 100% percent control!

Say: Today I will remain in control. I am the boss here. Any negative thoughts will be fired immediately.  If you don't like, you know where the door is! I don't have time for you if you have nothing to add to my day. So if you start taking away from my day, you are cut off!


When you start to think this way everyday that you wake up, it will become habit and you will start your day with control over your Depression. Pretty soon, when something happens that want to put a damper on your day, your new found control will not let it!
This is how you take back control.....at the starting line. Its always been there, just hanging out there! A line on the ground, waiting for you to take a stand in front of it! So....ready....on your mark...get set...........START!!!!!!!!!  
 I'll race you! If I win, you treat me to ice cream, you win I treat you. In the end.....we both get ice cream!! Win win!
Always.
Dr. Nobody

We can't call ourselves "human" anymore!


Who are we? What have we done to each other? The is nothing humane about us these days! We fight, we kill, we abuse, we neglect, we rape, we betray, we judge, we lie.

Our actions are no different than wild animals. Trying to intimidate in order to shy away the week. Challenging one another with such fierce aggression. Like freaking lions in Africa, it's all come down to the best hunting grounds and biggest territory. Destroying cubs that are not your offspring and only the acceptance of your own blood. Carelessly exiling "unworthy" "lame" members of the pride. Attacking outsiders just for getting too close. All about dominance.

There is no difference between them and us! How sad.

No wonder God put a detailed list of the Fruitages of the Spirit. He knew that without these qualities, what this world would come to!

Good news is, although we can't persuade others to start acting like humans...we sure can!


Did you know that doing something good for someone else actually makes us feel good? Yep, being an  altruist has been chemically proven to feel good. Just like when you eat your favorite foods, you feel so satisfied with every bite!

Well maybe, just maybe, if we all started to help one another out with no intentions of personal gain, your might start to feel a little happier!




Thought for the day:


Cause and effect....duh!




Dr. Nobody

Is there something in your past that you just can't seem to get over? You feel like it just happened yesterday and the pain you still feel is so real, no matter how long ago it happened? The memory of the even is so vivid, no matter how hard you try to delete it, it just wont go away!

I'm sorry to tell you that you can't delete it. It will be there forever and the images stuck in your head will pop up forever.

There is something you can do, though, you can  change how the memory of the event affect you. You can lessen the hurt and the hate. You can do this so much that instead of the memory sending you into a "low", it only hurts for a few hours, then later...it only hurts for 15 minutes. From that point, every time that memory pops up, it will only be a passing thought and you will have such an insignificant reaction to it that it doesn't affect you anymore. The memory of the even will no longer be able to control you!

To do this, you have to dissect the event and recognize at what point specifically, do you feel, changed you for the worst. If another person was involved, and you feel that they are responsible for what happened to you, then we need to look into why they did what they did. If it was just an event that happened and you were just there at the wrong place and time, then this will actually be a little easier.

Remember that you have every right to feel however you feel. In order for this to work, getting over something, you have to be willing to  change the way you see the event so that it can change the way you will now start feeling about it.

We all know that the first step to healing is to clean out those wounds. It's the most painful part, but the sooner you do it, the sooner it will heal, and the sooner you can go and get scraped up again...just kidding! No, but really, you gotta clean out your wounds so that you can move on. Let nothing hold you back!


If you would like to get started on that process email me at: helpfromdr.nobody@gmail.com



Happy healing!



Dr. Nobody

As you can see, by the lack of new posts, I have been doing well! I seem to get a lot of my inspiration from my "lows".

You too can go along time feeling better than usual. Before you know it, feeling well and inspired to live will be your new "usual".

Nobody is going to magically appear and wish your worries away. There is now Night in Shining Armor to make you feel better. There is no such Goddess who will use her charms to take your Depression away.

That's all you!

You have to do it! All you have to do is change your mindset. MINDSET.

If you can perceive something the opposite you do now, then the feeling you have now would be the opposite too!

Right now you feel hopeless, worthless, mad, hateful even. You have no desire to change anything you do because it's a waste of time and energy since you know nothing will work anyway. You are tired of feeling disappointed and getting your hopes up. You are also afraid of doing something that would actually work and then you think you will feel like a fool for not having the answer earlier, especially when  you find out the answer was a simple one.

All those negative thoughts and feelings are understandable, but, do you really want your Depression to go away? Don't say yes if you are not willing to do something about it! I don't care how many pills you've tried, how many psychologists  you have seen, how many times you've been "admitted", how many "attempts" you've made, or how many people you know think you just want attention. If you do not want to take a persons advice in order to help yourself find some relief, then as far as I'm concerned, stop complaining!

There's nothing more annoying than a person complaining about what's wrong with them, yet sits there all helpless waiting for a unicorn to show up so they can be in awe and finally believe in something and then think that maybe there is something worth living for since you have a new pet unicorn!!! Seriously?!

That's not going to happen, so stop wasting time, try something new...listen to me! You might be shocked at how easy it is to feel better!

Dr. Nobody

You can't turn to God for help if you have no idea who He is!
I have seen others roll their eyes and walk away when someone mentions God when it comes to seeking help. I understand the reaction, and would probably react the same if I did not have much back round in a faith or know much about God in the first place.

Or you could be one who grew up in a certain faith and had a horrible experience and since then has not sought to reconcile your own religious beliefs.

Either way, I think it is unreasonable to hit someone with God as being the answer to all their problems when they have yet to get to know Him. Do they even know that God wants them to be close to Him? Do they believe in God? Do they know God has a name just like they do?

How can you tell a person who has only been suffering for years from Depression that God is the answer!

If God isn't real to you, how can He help you?

Honestly, you aren't ready for God's help right now! You will be ready when you aren't mad at the world and blaming everyone for your problems. You cant be open to God's love with all that hate in your heart. You can't understand what He has in store for you if you refuse to listen in order to understand! You won't be able to enjoy life if you hide in the shadows.

Just like a child can't learn in a hostile environment, being yelled at, nose stuck in books being forced to listen or read when really they are only hating the entire experience. Ahhh, but a child surrounded by colors, bright images, a playful teacher, music and patience will learn anything you put in front of it!!!

Except your not a child.....so get yourself out of your hostile environment and get ready to learn new things and be open to feeling how great it feels to be full of new insights, wisdom and faith!





Thought for the day:

It's amazing how easy it is to climb out of a hole when a hand is reached out to you, but if you think you got this....let's see how long it takes you to get out by yourself!  Or...just take His hand!



Dr. Nobody

Be strong and take advantage of when you are clear headed. You never know when another bout of Depression is coming on, so you need to make the most out of your clear skies!

Get rib of as much clutter in your life as you can now that you can really see things they way they are and not the way Depressions fades them.

You have to be strong and trust yourself in these moments. No one else knows you better or what your needs are. This is the time to be brutally honest with yourself. No lies, no avoiding things. Just get it done!


Every time you do this, you will increase your strength...your ME Reflex.

It's time to do a "spring cleaning" and get rid of all the junk. If that means that it is a person that is poisoning your life, then so be it. Get it out!

I'm one of those person who has to do things the moment the idea come to me, otherwise the momentum is lost, and I get nothing done! Any one else like that??

That's goes for absolutely everything I do. Well maybe except parenting! When your kids need, you, they need you! Otherwise, If all the sudden I feel inspired to paint, I paint! I just thought of a story, I write! I'm craving a food and can already smell it, I go and make it! I have something really important on my mind, I pray!

A big part of being an authentic person is doing things when you feel like doing them, not when you have to, are told to, or are obligated to.

Same goes for even taking my advice. Don't do what I recommend, do what you feel like doing because you know it will better your life. And only do it when it feels like it's right. If you force yourself to do something your not feeling at that moment, you will be more prone to fail. When we fail, we go back to being bitter and less willing to seek changes or answers.


Thought for the day:


Don't let a sunny day fade away!


Always

Dr. Nobody

You know what I hate? It's when people around you try to justify my actions with their own reasoning.

If you don't like a decision I am making, you have no right to say that I don't know what I  am doing! Just because it does not go in your favor doesn't mean that it must be the Depression talking.

I really hate people who do this. Having Depression sucks and so does having bad people in our lives at the same time. Then when we are fine and we can clearly see all the poison being emitted from these people, we finally have two strong legs to stand on to defend our wellbeing, and they go on like they are the victim now that we want them gone! Really?

If you are only contributing to my Depression then you need to leave. I don't have time for you or the crap you bring. It might take a while to get your stench out but believe me it will be smelling like roses before too long!

It's my life and I don't need you in order to live. You want to be a part of my life, then prove to me why I should let you in!

I have enough problems trying to see the upside to things, to let you come around with a shadow on your arm. If you want to bring some laughter, smile, and life into my door, then great, come right in! Otherwise stay away until you can bring some light into my life.

Sorry if my rule are too demanding, but I was under the impression that the whole reason we have people in our lives was to enjoy each other, support each other, and encourage each other, but apparently I was wrong and we have to endure your bullshit too!


Whatever!


Fellow Depressed Ones, no one has a right to invade you life! It's your life and you get to choose who deserves to share it with you! You don't have time and energy to swim against the current. Take those people out of your life so you can live!


Always

Dr. Nobody

For having Depression, I watch a lot of dark stuff. I'm not afraid of death. In fact, on my worst days I pray for it. I know that sound absolutely horrible, but that's just the way the mind is!

I like watching forensic TV shows, detective stuff, and other shows that contain graphic images of murders and crimes.

Why?

I guess it's a reality check. So much bad is happening every second we are alive, and the thought of that shows me that it's obviously not happening to me, so I'm not doing to bad if I'm not in that situation. I also feel like I am being reminded of how ugly and evil this world is, and every time I see what these horrible people are capable of doing to another human being, I think of how much more I need to protect my children from it.

Not only that but with each account told, I pray for that person or all who were affected by these horrible things done to them. If they died, I pray that God bring them back to a new life!

The things I can't watch, are ones that involve children, those absolutely ruin my day. It also causes me to hate, and although people who could do such things to children deserve to be hated, I can't afford to let hate grow in my heart having Depression.

When I see how easily a person can lose their life over nothing at all, I realize how much I really do want to live! To watch my children grow and discover life themselves! To enjoy every moment that we are in each others lives.

It's so easy to be distracted by everyday tasks, that you never notice the little changes in your children everyday. There truly is something that can be appreciated by each one of them every single day, and that is what those shows help me realize! That I'm not crazy, I'm not lost to the devil, I'm sane in comparison!


If you have Depression and you have done nothing like what is on these shows......then there is hope for you! You are not lost forever, you are just taking the scenic route!



Always

Dr Nobody

For those of you who think that there is no help and that you are condemned to a life of Depression forever, you are wrong.

From my experience, the younger you are when you find the right answers, the easier it is to help yourself. Part of the reason that happens is because you have been suffering for so long and every attempt for relief has failed, that you end up becoming so pessimistic. You have every reason to feel that way. It's not your fault that you can't see any way out.

I will tell you this, if someone comes along your way, tells you that you don't have to live in Depressionville anymore, you need to stop what you are doing, and find out what they mean!

Listening to someone might just save your life!

Also, you will change when you are ready for change. It will not be easy and I'm sure you are aware of that, but wanting that change to happen bad enough is what will let you start being open to the change in the first place. When a person refuses help in any form that it is available in, he/she is either not fed up with living in hell yet, or just plain immature for throwing a fit and crossing their arms saying that there is no help!

Reminds me of the lottery commercials: You can't win if you don't play

Depression: You can't see the light if your eyes are shut...dummy!

Or, the one for Almond Milk:  What do you mean you won't try it because you don't know what it tastes like?!

Yeah, dumb right!

So quit pouting, rolling your eyes, and listen.

It's called: Cause and effect


The more you look for answers, the more likely  you will find one! The more you focus on something, the more you details you will be able to see! The more you practice using tools given to you, the more you will master them!

The more you do nothing, the more nothing will happen for you. The more you give up, the more you are giving up. The more obstinate you become, the more obsolete you become!

Which is better? Living the rest of your life complaining about how horrible your life is because you have Depression, or living the rest of your life living so you can leave Depression behind?


Dr Nobody

Believe it or not, as corny as it sounds, writing can help!

Someone I know had tons of issues, about everything. They thought they knew how they felt about things or thought their opinion on something was solid. After asking them various questions, turn out, they had no idea how they really felt about things!

Once they took my advice and started writing, they where not only able to release some stored up pressure, but they also were able to get down to the bottom of their issues. Some things from their past that they had always avoided, finally came out. Having confronted those things, they could now start to heal themselves!

Not only that, but writing your thoughts and feelings about things really helps you discover who you are. And who you are is really important! How can you defend yourself or make the right choices for yourself if you have no idea who you are or what you believe?

Most of us think that no one else knows us better, but the reality is that, most the time you don't either!

If there is something major going on in your life right now, you need to sit down, grab a note pad, and write it all down! Write what is happening, how it is affecting you, what you think about it, how you feel, and what you can learn from it that will strengthen you for the future!

And don't be a smart ass and say that there's nothing you can take away form the experience because it's a bad one!

There is a negative for every positive, an opposite! So no matter how horrible the event is that is happening to you, there is always going to be that one positive thing(or maybe a few), that can completely change what is happening to you.

Most of us never see a positive side when something negative is happing to us. We are blinded from it. But you don't have to be, you can choose to see it if you want to. I'm telling you that for your own good! Open your eyes, look around, and look for the little spec of light! It will get bigger the closer you get to it!


You will be surprised what you will find out about yourself once you see what you look like on paper!


Always

Dr. Nobody

Fear is probably the worst thing you can find in this world(or spiders)!

No really, fear is the root cause of so many horrible things that we can see just after one minute of watching the news. I don't just mean a phobia of something, I mean the fear that causes us to do what we do. Almost everything we do, we do it out of fear!

We love because we fear of not being loved back. We love because we might fear being alone. We love because we fear what might happen if we don't love. We love because we fear it's opposite.

We are angry because we fear being hurt again. We hate because we fear changing our point of view. We are jealous because we fear we are not good enough. We are emotionless because we fear for the worst.

We go to war because we fear what would happen if we didn't fight back. We lie because we fear the consequences of our own actions. We are materialistic because we fear what other might think of us if we have less. We are tough assholes because we fear being thought of as a pushover. We are violent because we fear loss of control.

We stick to tradition because we fear feeling like a fool for never seeking the truth behind what we believed all this time. We deny God because we fear the changes that need to be made once you know. We stick to a religion because we fear judgment of those we've been seeing every Sunday. We defend our churches even after countless accounts of sexual molestation by the priests because we fear reality.

We give up on our health because we fear the lack of results. We stay in that abusive relationship because we fear that no one else will accept you. We are controlling our wives because we fear that if we don't she will find someone better than me. We fight because we fear that if nothing is ever wrong then maybe it isn't real. We stay together because we fear that we won't find someone who will accept and love your children.

Fear is the root cause of 99% of our actions. Fear is powerful. Fear has been controlling all of us. The funny thing about fear is that it is just an emotion, and God has let us control our own emotions. Yet, we have let an emotion take control over everything we do!!

The few of us who seek the truth, look for  answers that make sense, ask questions, learn who to change along with the new information they receive, are the ones who are taking back the control they have lost. They are the ones who want to find the meaning of being alive!



Thought for the day:

Imagine if Wisdom was the root cause of all our actions!!


Always

Dr. Nobody

The hopelessness one can feel in Depression is so overwhelming. You are consumed by all the negative and sad thoughts of everything you don't have, everything you aren't, everything you have lost. With all of that hitting you all at the same time, you really do feel like you and your life has no value so why even be alive.

Trying to imagine things that seem so far out of your reach, seeing yourself as something better than what you think you are now, and all that has been lost finding it's way back to you, is all so impossible that the best we can do is try to imagine it. And because we are only capable of trying to imagine, nothing seems worthwhile to even give a real effort.

The longer we are stuck in the Hopelessness Suite at The Depression Hotel, the more we want to stay in the room. It's all we know. To us, leaving the room is way too risky. We know how to be sad. We know how to curl up in a ball and cry for hours. We know how to justify the darkness that surrounds us.

We don't know how to let fear go. We don't know how to do something that might just hurt us again. We don't know how to react to new changes that might show us that we have been in hell when we could've been in paradise this whole time. Telling us that all this bad stuff we have been living can all go away in the snap of your fingers only makes us more upset.

How dare you tell us that all the pain and suffering, hurt and the hate, loss and loneliness we have been enduring will all mean nothing if we only come out of the room. How can that be? Does that mean everything I have felt for the last days, months, and years has been for nothing?



And that my friends, is why we might stay in the dark.


Like a terrified animal stuck in that dark corner. It ran there to seek safety in hiding. Not wanting to be seen but able to see the outside. But there is not water no food no light. So now that it's been there quivering in it's dark place, it is also not nourishing it's body. It's eyes have accustomed to the dark and the cold. Seeing the outside world look so scary form here.


But if you don't get out soon, the lack of food, water, and contact with all life forces will bring you to your end.


Just as when the lights turn on and for a split second your eyes  hurt for the new adjustment, so this will be too! I know you don't want to turn on the light. It's bright, I know.

How about if you cover your eyes, I turn on the light, then you slowly uncover your eyes as the start to adjust!

Once you are in the light, you will finally be able to see what wasn't visible while you sat in the darkness! That darkness made everything you saw a shade darker, maybe even black! Now you will see everything as it is and I promise that you will see every brilliant color as it was made to be!

Everything you suffered and have felt while in the darkness is still real, it still means a lot. You didn't suffer for no reason and you have every right to have felt the way you have all that time. Let me help you find out what it was all for!



Thought for the day:

It can take up to 20 years for pearl to be made....but first it's stuck in that dark place in a shell!! (just saying!)


Always

Dr. Nobody

It's so easy to use your Depression as an excuse. An excuse to justify your behavior, the lack of trying, and an excuse to not have to have responsibilities that you have gotten away with not having for a very long time!

Just like any other disease, if the suffer uses it in order to gain pity and have everything done for them, then you deserve to suffer from whatever the sickness is. Being mad at the world because you have a problem is not right, and making your family and friends have to deal with it just makes you look worse of a person.

Every human being has the capacity to be great. No matter what ailments we suffer from, we still have the ability to be awesome! There is so much more than staying home and bathing in self pity.

Go out and find what you are good at. If that happens to be a hundred things, then great!

If you refuse to accept that only you can make your Depression better, then so be it. Stay that way...but quit making others pay for your choices!

Now if you have that "Ah ha!" moment, then you just made everyone happy! I don't know you, but even I would be truly happy for you if you have been lost in Depression and then all the sudden you realize that your life is worth living! I want fellow sufferers to find the control they lost when Depression took over their lives. It feels so good so see the progress you make every time you have a low and see that each time it lasts less and less!


Though for the day:

The moment you choose to take back your life, you will start living!

Yours Truly

Dr. Nobody

Today is a very sad day for me. just two years ago I lost my Grandfather.

I was all happy go lucky today until I was accidentally reminded of had happened two years ago today. So far there has been no other even that has been able to compare to this worst day of my life.

He was always supportive and kind to me. He taught me how to cook. The memories of those times are priceless! The memories of him telling me stories of growing up are wonderful! But the advice and lessons he taught me are even more valuable!


I want nothing more to crawl up into a ball and cry all day, but I can't. If I loose my cool, all the work I have done do strengthen myself will have proven to fail. I will do my best to distract myself.

Maybe I'll take my kids to do something fun! Or maybe I'll go to a bookstore, I can spend hours in a bookstore! I might even do a spring cleaning of the house so I can be really distracted!!

All I know is that I have to do something! If I don't occupy my mind with something productive, it will leave time to dwell on the loss. I can't have that.

I'm stronger than that.

I can hold back the tears. It's a choice. I am going to choose to be strong and be the wiser. I know that if I don't control my thoughts, my emotions will take over. But I am one of the strongest persons I know. I intend on keeping it that way!


I am strength. I am wise. I am in control. I am ME!


Always

Dr. Nobody

I can't stress enough, the importance of strengthening your ME Reflex. If you have kids and have Depression, it's a matter of life and darkness for you children for you to do so. The chances are pretty high for them to have Depression. You can greatly impact their lives by you being the best you can with managing your Depression so that if they inherit it, theirs will be mild. Mild due to you teaching them how to change the way they perceive and react to problems and people throughout their lives.


My daughter started to show signs of Depression and after two weeks of seeing her crying everyday after school because someone said something that hurt her feeling or because I said "no" to something, I call my Naturopath doctor right away and gave her a remedy. Within days her emotional reactions became more normal. She had only had to take the remedy dose once! Today we still work on building her ME Reflex so that she can maintain her stability.

By me having worked on my ME Reflex all these years, the moment my daughter showed signs of Depression, I was able to address it in time before it could conquer her little heart and mind!  Had I never found the awareness I did, I would've been all involved and lost in my own Depression and never noticed or been aware of my child's mental and emotional state!

By no means should you only strengthen your ME Reflex if you have kids. You HAVE to for your own sake. Not to mention God owns you! Yes, He made you so that you can live! He made the earth so that YOU can enjoy it, breathe the fresh air, smell the rain, see the beauty, feel the thunder, see the endless skies and feel the love for fellow humans! He gave us our senses in order to fully take in all that He has given us, but He also gave us our mind, heart and soul in order to take all that to the 100th degree!

So when we are having a malfunction, we need to do our best to fix it so that we can use what He so kindly gave us!


Thought for the day:

You are your most precious belonging, how well do you take care of your stuff?


Always

Dr. Nobody

Some might think that my last post was a little harsh. However, real life usually is. One might also wonder what parenting has to do with this Depression blog, it has a lot to do with it when you are the parent of a depressed person!

If we as parents did a better job at raising fine kids, we would better equip them with the tools they need to survive in this cruel world.

Kids are developing Depression at younger and younger ages than they were ten years ago! Our kids are freaking out. They don't know how to make real decisions. To them a choice is chocolate or vanilla ice cream!

When they are faced with real problems, they panic, don't measure consequences then when they have made the wrong choice, the get depressed. Then us parents are surprised and don't understand what went wrong or why our kids keep screwing up!

Because we didn't show them how to make wise decisions, how to think things through, not take things personally and show them that their best is enough. All these things feed into growing a strong healthy person.

Had certain values, lesson, wisdoms and concepts been shown to kids, the less chance there will be for them to ever have depression. Just like we should all be building up our immune systems, we need to help our kids build their ME Reflex too!


Now for the lax parents. You need to care more about your kids. Letting them roam the streets mean that the streets will teach them. Don't call yourself a parent if you are letting the world bring up your child.

Then when your kid goes missing or worse, you all cry and panic when you should be the one to blame. It's called neglect. You neglected to give a crap about where and who your kid hangs around with. How do you not know what your kids is doing? I don't get how people can care so little about their kids.

The world is not what it used to be. There are really bad people out there who are just waiting for you not to care about your kid. They are sitting around watching and loving how you leave you child to fend for itself.

Tell me, how are kids going to get involved in drugs, gangs, and sex if they are sitting in your house doing something productive while dinner is being made?


I just want to slap some parents!

We can prevent all these meltdowns that our kids are having if we just started to look at our parenting. We can give them the tools need to cope with life's problems and show them how to make the wiser choices and accept responsibility for their actions. As a parent you can help decrease the statistics of Depression in the younger generation.

Always

Dr. Nobody

Stop giving your kids everything! Stop being the drill Sargent too!

Everything is about balance.

For the parents who buy and buy and keep buying things for their children, you are not doing them any favors. You are only showing them affections through materialism. I'm sure you love seeing their reaction when they receive all the things you give them and it "make you happy to see them happy", but let me tell you a secret: Their smiles are just as big when you sit and play cars with them, or have tea with Mr. Waffles!

For the parents who truly think that they have to overspend and over plan special events for their kids...is "over"reacting!

You are only teaching them that happy memories come from objects. I hate to brake it to you, but you have a mental problem! Do you not see that all the time, money and effort you spend on acting this way is really only for you? Yes, you are being selfish. It's you wanting to see their smile so you can feel a smile on your own face! It's similar to when a parent pushes their child to succeed in school and sports...those overachievers, it's the parent who is looking for the gratification. The recognition and the praise, and when awards are to be given the parents say" I'm so proud of you!". The Selfish parents just want the sense of pride because the have no feelings of genuine pride for anything else in their lives.

You are doing the same thing for your kids. And it's all fake. They don't really care about the new toy that just cost you an arm and a leg. They don't care that you bought all the party favors, all matching theme crap, a clown and a petting zoo rentals. How many times have you heard a sincere thank you from your kids for all that stuff you have done for them?

You need to brake that cycle before they grow up and think that that is how you love children. Hurry, before they do it to their kids!

Now for you super strict parents, you have mental problems too. You have control issues. So if you had kids just so you can have control of something, you deserve to have your kids taken away from you.

As a privilege from God, He intended that we would help bring up a child. Protect them and guide them. Doing so would result in adult who would then have their own children and protect and guide them too. That cycle was to be repeated not mistreated. Your children are not your soldiers or your slaves. They belong to God.

Can you imagine how it must feel to have entrusted us humans to help bring up life and yet most children have no idea who God is!

The further away we get form Him, the more screwed up things get and then we stupidly wonder why! Why is this world so horrible, why so many diseases, why so much death and hate?

Because we are teaching our kids to love material things, never showing them that natural affection and love for our neighbors is the cure to war and hate. We are teaching them that is is okay to be in control of other humans especially if they are "your kids and you are going to raise them how ever you please".

Get off you power trip, stop loving your kids with things and analyze yourself so that you can see how wrong you are, then brake the cycle and truly raise your kids with real love...God's love.


No wonder we are all depressed!

Thought for the day:

Parents who spoil---SPOIL is a negative word.
Parents who are drill Sgt.s- Find your fellow strict parents and go open a new jail, it will be filled with all your kids!
Parents who are lax-.....You'll be on the next blog!

Truly

Dr. Nobody

A part from being sick, in two days I have seen to bad accounts of child abuse. I am truly scarred by it.

I couldn't sleep.

Does it make me just as evil to want to destroy the people who could do such a thing to God's babies?

If my heart hurts for the little ones, I can only imagine the rage God must feel.

The wicked in this world is only the devils fault. I do feel sorry for those who mistakenly blame God. They apparently do not know Him enough!


The reason for me bringing this up in my blog is because so many who suffer from Depression can't watch news for the very reason that is has a larger impact on us. I will be screwed up for a while now but I know my only help is from God.

You cannot forget God. He is with you and He does hear you. He wants nothing more than to see you in the light and out of the darkness forever.

There is only one thing you have to do...call on Him!


Thought of the day:

Blaming God is like blaming your parents for anything that ever went wrong for you. Are you telling me your brain doesn't work that you have never made one decision yourself? That's what I thought.


Truly Yours

Dr. Nobody

My sister had shared a quote:


" It's been said, 'time heals all wounds'. I do not agree. The words remain. In time, the mind, protecting it's sanity, covers them with scar tissue and the pain lessons. But it's never gone."  - Rose Kennedy


I strongly disagree.

As time passes you lose interest in the event altogether and slowly the wound starts to heal. The less you are, the more you heal. In reality, it's not so much the actual action that hurts, it's the betrayal of the one you thought you knew, that actually hurts. Then you start to wonder what other things you thought were true or not all this time!

But the truth is, when you start to see people for what they are, the shock of their actions against you no longer hurt....it will then become you just putting up with their crap and getting tired of it!

And that, my friends, takes time! Time to let people show their true colors!!

Yes there will be scars, but that is just proof that you have been hurt before! If it is scarred, it's also healed! There is nothing wrong with the memory of a wound, no matter how deep or how painful it was. The scar is also proof that you survived and are well today!

Now if you refuse to let go of something, then that would be just like putting a Band-Aid over the wound, and that is not good.

Time will heal your wounds, because only in time will you learn that you can either let the wound(s) heal or not......totally up to you....they are your wounds, no one else's!!


Always

Dr. Nobody

You know, the moment you decide to change your life is the very moment you become great! To be great you don't have to be a man made millionare. You don't have to have invented some new technology or have walked on the moon.

All it takes to be great is to be better than before. Before what? Before yesterday, or before you just made the decision. Before you read this blog! It doesn't matter, the simple act of deciding to be greater than you were just a moment ago is what make you the greatest right now!

Who cares if you have messed up a lot. So just because you didn't know any better before, means you can't do better now? All of that doesn't matter now. That happened before, but now you know and now is the moment you decide if you are going to be greater than you were yesterday!

You can do it! You just have to decide. Make the disicion to be the greatest you have ever been! Everyday wake up deciding to be greater than yesterday...then you WILL be!




Thought for the day:

If you keep over thinking the steps you'll have to take to bring great new changes, you'll never take the first step!


Truly

Dr. Nobody

You have Depression, so what!!

You know, having Depression doesn't mean you get to get away with things or not doing certain things. You need to be accountable for you actions just like any other person. Being depressed does not give you a free hall pass, a get out of jail free card, or an insanity plea!

You have an illness, yes, but that is only half of who you are!

The other half of you is just fine and functions just like the rest of the world. That mean that you KNOW what you are doing and are well aware of all consequences, good and bad. Stop with the excuses or the pity party.

You can't just think that you have nothing or nobody because of your Depression. Yes Depression is a massive black cloud invading your life...open a flipp'n window and air that shit out!

If telling yourself that there is now help out there for you, you are right, out the is only encouragement and you life waiting for you to live it. The help is in the mirror!

If you are not open to what will improve you life and give you the control over your Depression, then you are just a jerk. Plain and simple. Like the alcoholic who is in denial. The slut who is just trying to provide for her kids. Seriously, open your eyes. You are an alcoholic and act like a fool, you are a slut who wants easy money instead of really working, and you have Depression and you are not possessed by demons so the crap you do and don't do is totally up to you and is your fault!

It's like the Diabetic who is still eating all that crap, the lung Cancer patient who still smokes, the morbidly obese who get surgery and have no results because the keep stuffing their face with burgers and fries! I can't stand dumb people. If you refuse to take responsibility for your actions, then leave everyone else alone, quite crying about your situation and making your family and friends deal with your self inflicted drama!

Now that I just slapped you into your senses, what now?

Well, first start forgiving yourself for your past mistakes and know that now you know what not to do! Now you can start fresh, just like that! Start fresh today, don't waste any time and make your life better right now!

You just got your control back. It's in your hand now! What are you going to do? Drop it and keep making excuses, or grab hold of it and refuse to let it go?



Thought for the day:

Because of our Depression, we are already at the bottom, all we have is to go up!


Always

Dr. Nobody

Is your therapy working?

So how do you know if it is or if it's not? You go weekly, monthly or maybe even more frequent than that. Well let me tell how  you can find out if you are benefiting or not!

If you feel like you can't miss one session, it's not working!

If you have been going for over a year, it's not working!

If you where to measure you Depression on a scale of 1 to 10 of how you felt going into the therapy and what you would be at now, if you are just a few numbers up, it's not working!



Let me tell you why.

Therapy, for example, physical therapy, is meant to get you back to the best you can be. Say you broke a leg so you go to therapy and gradually you get the strength back until you can function on your own or with very minimal help(crutches, walker, etc.). The whole point is that you build the strength and stability to sustain yourself!

So why are people going to psychologist and or therapist for years?

Plain and simple. Money.

It's sad but true! Gosh, even rehab does better. Once you've been clean for a bit, they hope to never see you again. They hope they have been able to provide you with what you need to not have a relapse!

A therapist/psychologist/councilor should be doing the same for you. They are suppose to provide you with support, guidance and tools that will help you gain your strength so that you can sustain yourself and get through your Depression! Once they have done that, there is no need to go back on a regular basis. Sure, make a phone call to give thanks for their help or just to let them know how well you are doing. If you have an occasional fall, set up a session just to boost your ME Reflex.

So if you find yourself in this position, what should you do?

Stop going to that one. If you feel you need to go to some type of therapy, then interview a new one. The first and only question you should ask them is "How many years have you had a clients?", if they give an answer of more than one year...say no thank you and search some more!

A therapist who has you feeling like you need them as if they are your fix, has got you just where they want you!

If you just need someone to talk to or listen to your problems, if that is all you feel you need, then write me. I'm free! I will always respond. I won't judge you. I won't waste your time because I am always here for when you need to talk or express yourself. Ask away, I will answer!

I have better tools and fist hand experience in Depression in order to help a fellow sufferer. That is what this blog is for, free help and insight for those who suffer from Depression or those who need help coping with their loved one who suffers!

Always

Dr. Nobody

Start off small.

When I talk about taking control of your Depression, I don't expect it can be done in a week! There are too many things to change and strengthen. Changes you thoughts about stuff takes time and repetition. It's something you have to do daily. It's not hard to do either.

Everyone in the world at almost everything they do, can apply the concepts that can change their lives! There are at least five times in you day that you can apply any one or all four of the Four Agreements.

You know, when I first had read them, a part of me was afraid to change. I thought that if what the book said was true that then that meant that I wouldn't care about things anymore. Years later, it was right. I no longer care for the drama, negativity, problems, opinions of others. This turned out to be just what I needed! Not caring about all those things meant that I was CHOSING not to let them in my life. Granted, I still have my own problems, but not other peoples problems. If someone I know has drama, I don't get involved, give advice if they come to me but in all, I keep my distance so that their crap doesn't invade my space.

Everyone can easily make another's problem their own, and most of the world does that. You don't have to take stuff personally, if you don't, you just took yourself out of the drama. That means you have more time to free!

You can do your best at work, school, or home. You can be taking a test, in a meeting, or cleaning house....and still tell yourself to do your best! And because you keep telling yourself to do your best, you will, and you will feel good with every task you do!

When I'm driving, I constantly tell myself to do my best and pay attention. Do my best to be aware of the cars around me, weather conditions, animals, and how my own car is driving.

At work, I tell myself to do my best to get stuff done and done right. The end of the day comes and I'm happy with what I did do!

I don't take it personally when I'm attacked for something. If I made a mistake on something, I say oh well, let's fix it and done!

When someone wants to judge me, my immediate thought is "you don't know me", and most times I won't even bother correcting their judgement. I actually take pleasure in knowing that they don't know how wrong they are, they can go ahead and walk around with a head full of nothing!!

In my line of work, things have to be very clear. I have to know exacting what I am doing and there is no guessing. I can't make any assumptions. Besides, it flatters people to be asking all kinds of questions, they feel smart!

I'm honest in how I will tell things how they are not how you wish them to be. I'm not one for insulting, degrading or even for complimenting. If I'm in an argument, I would rather keep my mouth shut so that I don't say things in the heat of the moment.

You need to constantly have it in the back of your head, that you are not going to say hurtful or misleading thing, not let anyone ruin your day, ask questions so you understand and communicate better, and always always tell yourself to do your best!

Truly

Dr. Nobody

Don't abandon us!

We have Depression and at our lowest, we depend on the kindness and care from others. Don't give up on us! We need you to show us the way back to life!

I don't get why when we are at our worst, all the sudden we find ourselves alone. This isn't always, kudos to the friends and family who have stuck in there giving and giving! As for the rest of you said " I can't do this anymore!" and walked away or denied to help when you do have it in your means to do so.....God's watching you!!!!

When you deny someone, anyone in their time of need, you only encourage the loss of hope they have. They already think that they are alone and that there is nothing good in life, and by you turning away....you just proved them right. It doesn't matter if they happen to be in need a lot, the point is that they need. It's not like they want, no they need!

You have no idea how your words and attitude impact our minds when you don't make yourself available when we need you most. Like a broken record we play them over and over and with each time it brings sadness, anger, and loss.

What has happened to this world? We have forgotten how to be human.


Thought for the day:

I delight in God's having warned you, yet you think you do right, you will see...today it's called "karma".

Always

Dr. Nobody

Distracting the depressed!

You have now idea how powerful a good distraction can be! When we the depressed are occupied with stuff, there is hardly any room to be sad. We might be a little short on enthusiasm, but being busy is far better than dwelling in Depression!

For us the depressed:

Keep yourself busy. Find activities that you like that offer rewards. Be it painting, and the reward is being able to be proud of you work. Hiking, the reward being that you not only get to enjoy the view but you get to pat yourself on the back for making it to the top! Anything that involves you doing something, will be a good enough distraction. It will leave you with less time to lay under the covers crying! Trust me, you'll be happy you gave your Depression the run-around!!

For the non-sick people:

Help your loved depressed one to find the distractions and help motivate them. Sometimes you shouldn't even ask if they want to do something, just call and let them know you are on your way, or even in extreme cases....show up unannounced and pull them out of bed or peal them off the couch!!

Remember that Depression is not laziness, attention seeking, or any other stigma the world has placed on it. Depression is a dark place where the dwellers are stripped of happiness, dreams, hope, desire to live, and almost all value in life. So when in a "low" is like when you get to security points in an airport and you have to take all you stuff off and put it in a tub and your luggage goes through the scanner thing, Depression does the same thing, except you don't get to keep you happiness or sane mind when you pass the gate!


Thought for the day:

Sometimes Depression thinks it's winning, give it the run-around and stay one step ahead of it!!


Truly Yours

Dr. Nobody

Defeating the demons.

As I have stated before, I have been battling Depression for many years, and although I have found way to ease the symptoms, I still get tired of it all. I hate that I am responsible for the well being of myself. I want so much to be taken care of and wish that I didn't have to be held accountable for my moods!

It's like when you find out truths in the Bible and once you know, if you go against what you now know, you'd be sinning!

Once you know that most of you Depression can be controlled by you, there's no excuse to letting things get you in such negative ways! I can't stop what others do or say, but I can stop them from doing or saying it to me!

So if something is said and done to me, if it's not the first time, it probably happened because I let it. Now the fault would be mine for having this new hurt. At least I can not let it hurt that much, though!

I can still take responsibility for having given the person the chance to hurt me, and yet be strong enough to not let it bring me down so hard. I might just be grumpy for a while, but not the whole day!

When things like this happens, I just for give myself for letting it happen, for give the person for being an idiot, applaud myself for not letting it ruin my day, and listen to my favorite heavy metal song that surprisingly relaxes me!!

Thought for the day:

Take responsibility, forgive yourself and the idiot, pat yourself on the back!

Always

Dr. Nobody

Just want to disappear?

Sometimes I do!

Not to be confused with being suicidal. Wanting to disappear is not the same thing. I have no wish to hurt myself much less kill myself. Just want to disappear for some time!

Maybe disappear into nothing, thin air, just vanish! Or maybe like up and leave where no one can find me. No phone, no people. Just a place I can lay with the sun shining on my face. A place where I can think with no distractions. Think about all the good things, remember the wonderful memories that I store up for back up! A place I can sit as the sun sets and listen to the sounds of night coming. Once night falls, star gaze and start up a real long conversation with God!

I feel more relaxed just imagining all that! It's wonderful! I think I can get through the rest of my day now!

Always

Dr. Nobody

Good morning all!

For those who are currently on meds, continue taking! In some of my blogs I have talked about how I believe that they are not necessary to help your Depression. There are many who take them and have been on them for a long time. I am aware that by stoping, that may result in some serious consequences.

I do believe that there is hope for those who are on meds, that they can come to a point where they can gradually stop taking them.

It's a matter of self improvement. Because Depression is a sickness of the mind that affects the emotions, then the mind is where one should start. Yes, I know, Depression supposedly is a result of a chemical imbalance. If that is the case and the only reason that one has Depression in the first place, then the entire world, every single person would have Depression. No one is chemically balanced, no one.

So, just like any sickness that requires one to take measures to help themselves improve their health, Depression is the same way!

1. Change your thoughts
2. That will change your feelings,
3. And that will change your overall reaction to every and all situations!

I bet many are thinking, how can this help the most severe Depression? Well it will.

In the most grave of situations, you can change your thoughts about what is happening or what was just said. If you can do this, your typical reaction will be altered so that whatever it is, affect you differently.

A depressed person is highly sensitive to everything. The good and the bad. Our internal senses are heightened just like when you have a drink or two and all the sudden you feel like the music is better, everything is fun, you are usually even light on your feet and might get up to dance!

Can you imagine not feeling like you just got stabbed in the heart when someone insults you! Can you imagine you day not being ruined by the a$*hole who cut you in line at the coffee shop! Or not being affected by the co-worker who usually finds a way to get on your last nerve.

There are a million things that set us off and irritate our symptoms, but what if you can boost you "ME Reflex" so much that you Depression level starts to minimize to only being mild? Wouldn't that be the answers to your prayers?

We you can! Anyone can! I bet some of the most severe cases of Depression can be drastically reduced to mild! Once at that point, being taken off of meds will no longer be high risk! Before you know it, you can be free of drugs and free to live!


Truly

Dr. Nobody

The difference of Depression and feeling depressed.

I have seen all kinds of Depression and people who are depressed and ones who suffer from PTSD, which can bring depression.

I touched on the subject once before on one of the blogs, but for those are unaware or curious, I am going to break down the differences so that they can be easily recognized!

PTSD(Post Traumatic Stress Disorder) is when certain experiences one has gone through have made such a negative impact on a person that, after the fact(could be right way or from years ago) the are victim to stress that can also bring depression. More things are cause by PTSD, nightmares, anger, loss of control, rage, and some health issues as a result.

For the most part, PTSD has more familiarity with those who have returned form war. However, PTSD can be from anything to a horrible childhood, witnesses to crimes or victims of one, and any other abuse one suffers. You will never be the same after seeing or being the victim of a traumatic event like that.

 In my personal opinion, though, for the ones who have suffered a traumatic past or event that is more than a year past, that should be called DCD(Delayed Coping Disorder). The reason for that, is because I have seen people(mostly male, males tend to be more guarded in showing emotions) who have had horrible childhoods and it's not until they are adults who are now going through a certain event or change that they are now having to deal with, that ends up bringing out old memories and feelings.

So because they are just now going through an emotional change brought on by stuff like, divorce, separation, a physical ailments that brings limitations, etc., they are mentally and emotionally vulnerable and weak. It seams as though the devil is attacking them and decides to open up old wounds to for the heck of it.

The problem in these cases is that a Dr. will tell them they have Depression and put them on meds! That is not the answer and they don't have Depression!



Being depressed.  You are depressed if you just lost your job and now you are stressing about bills, food, supporting yourself or a family. You are depressed because you and your partner are having problems and you fear a separation or divorce. You are depressed because you just lost a loved one and the grief is intense. You are depressed because you are in debt a bazillion dollars because you  absolutely can't live with out those shoes or the new tools. You are depressed because you are tired and bored or you life. You are depressed because you have made a long chain of bad decisions and are stuck with the consequences. You are depressed because you are lonely because you're not very social. You are depressed because you got in a spat with a sibling, parent or friend but you really do value the relationship. You are depressed because your ego has been hurt. You are depressed because you push yourself to your limits and you feel like it's still not enough. You are depressed because you are overweight but pizza, soda, and wings are your favorite.

Feeling depressed means you feel a little down in the dumps but it is only temporary and always can be fixed! You will find that your depressed feelings will subside as soon as you find a new job, fix you relationship or get a new one, adapt to the loss of the loved one, make a credit card payment so you can go shopping again, find something productive to do,  stop screwing up, go out and say hi to people and be friendly, don't argue, learn how to be wrong once in a while, learn that no one is perfect and you are not the exception, start exercising so the pizza/soda/wings don't show!


Depression is something that you will have that will last forever. No quick fixes here. You can have everything the material world has to offer or you can have nothing at all and your Depression will be the same either way! It will appear and disappear at the wrong time or best time in your life. It doesn't care. You can have Depression and when someone tells you the sky is falling, you look at them and tell them "that's great!, nothing fazes you. The thought of losing all the above things I mentioned, has no importance to you. Where as the other person only feel depressed for having lost any of those things!

So here was the quick breakdown of the differences, I hope it was not confusing and I by no means have any intention of offending anyone. I'm a very honest person so I gave very honest explanations of which each is!

I would love some feedback, so feel free to express your thought on the matter!

Though for the day:

Horrible two car accident on major freeway:  Survivor#1 "Awe man, I have no insurance, I'm screwed! Fines, car is totaled, how am I going to get to work? What am I going to do, my life is over!"   Survivor#2 "What? I didn't die!"
....That's Depression!

Always

Dr. Nobody

Dwelling in the darkness.

You know, no matter how many years I have put into practice the concepts that have proven to improve my life, I still have those days. It's part of the sickness, I know, but todays blog is just about how it's ok to loose it! My best is all I can do for whatever condition I'm in at that moment.

If I have a horrible cold and at the same time am in a "low" or just one off day, I have to realize that the quality of my best is not going to be at the same level as when I am not sick but still in a "low". 

All this comes to mind because this weekend I was visiting family, but the location was the same location of where I once lived and just happened to have the best year of my life! Nothing extra special happened that year, it was just a year that I don't recall having not one "low". I went one whole year getting to have a break from Depression! Sure, we had some financial difficulties and other typical hardships that life brings, but it was the happiest year I can recall.

The place is absolutely beautiful and peaceful. So peaceful that deer, javalina, and quails ran around freely. There's a creek nearby that made for perfect picnics and swimming. The house was small yet inviting.  Being on a mesa, the sunsets were breath taking! Most importantly, the family unit was as strong as it had ever been!


I have been in a "low" recently and am not quite out of it yet. Thanks to the changes I have made to my way of thinking, my "lows" are only half as severe as they used to be. I still withdraw myself from family and public places. I prefer to stay indoors, and am very emotionally sensitive to the smallest things. I no longer am suicidal, or hate myself.

Being in a "low" already and then going back to this place that, although has wonderful memories, got me all choked up and on the verge of tears. I had to use every bit of strength I had to hold it in while I was there. Once I got home, it was another story!

I just dwelled on how things used to be and asking why couldn't everything be like it was then. I felt mad at the present for not being like the past. Only at moments like these, do I truly hate change. The more I dwelled on how things have changed, the darker my heart felt with anger and hate.

I knew it would pass but having to be reminded how things will never be again, was what really broke my heart. It's a place I will avoid going to as best I can in order to avoid all the negative feelings that it brought. Even though memories lived there were happy ones, it's the comparison of what used to be and what most likely will never be, that would keep a person away instead of wanting to be there. I have family there and although I enjoy their company, being in a "low" and having this unexpected reaction to going there, I cannot go again any time soon. Even out of the "low", going might provoke another negative reaction and could be the reason for the start of another "low".

So for the abnormally un-sick people, if you know of a friend or family member who stays away, a reason like this might be why! I hope you are understanding and supportive of your depressed one!

Thought for the day:

The memory is cherished, it's the fact that things couldn't remain as such, that break the heart!

Truly Yours

Dr. Nobody

The truth will set you free!

Ever heard that before? If you have you probably recognize it from a scripture. And the words have more than just one way to be applied to your life!

For me those words have been words to live by, not only  in the Biblical sense, but also in everyday life and concerning anyone in my life. From always telling the truth in a relationship and being honest about my feelings, to saying "yes" when asked if your butt looks big in those pants! Ask me, because I will tell you the truth!

I am the one to come to if you want an honest opinion. If you feel like others are trying not to hurt your feelings and you have a feeling they are sugar coating something, ask me, you'll get the truth from me.

I have learned that by sugar coating stuff, you only hurt the person by not being honest. That goes for absolutely everything and anything. Yes the truth hurts but like I stated at the beginning, it will set you free too!

In one day, there are many ways to adopt this new value. Not just to people you see throughout a day but mostly to yourself. Like any values that one might have, it's not just something you wake up one morning and say " I think I'll ware truthfulness today!"

No, it is something that you have to practice and learn. The more you put this value into affect, the more it will just become a way of being for you. It will be natural for you to be truthful. When you so master it, you and others will see such a difference!

Being truthful with yourself is most important. This honesty will keep you in check and keep you real and genuine.

As a depressed person, we tell ourselves lies all the time. We even believe the lies that others tell us. Most of the time we are in denial of how bad our "lows" really are, or how much help we really need. Yet if we learned how to be truthful to ourselves, seeking proper help and realizing our weakness and our strengths, we can find true recovery!

Tell yourself the truth. No more lies, no more excuses...just the truth.

Don't ever be ashamed of how you feel or what you think. The moment you have to re-think how you feel or what your first thought was, it is no longer your true feeling or thoughts.

Say what you mean how you mean it, don't even change the words. Say the first words that came to your mind and blurt it out. Words are what we use to communicate, so use them, even if they are blunt! Don't be sorry for how you feel or how what you say might offend someone else.

Don't be truthful when you are in the middle of an argument or when someone else is attacking you. Only be truthful when it comes to your feeling. You have every right to feel however you want, your feelings are yours not anyone else's'. 

In a heated argument, we tend to say things that are only true at that moment, we after it's said and done it's not how we truly feel. It's like when kids are fighting over a toy or something and they will say stuff like " Well you're not my friend anymore", or " I hate you", it's only true for that moment that they are mad, but it's not how they really feel when the situation is normal!

Thought for the day:

Make truth be your top value because if the truth sets you free, then lies and dishonesty have you wrapped in a straight jacket!

Always

Dr. Nobody

Depression and control.

If you have depression or are currently depressed brought on by a life changing event, you need to know that you can control it!

Depression is like being stuck driving a big huge ugly dump truck( no, I'm not dogging garbage truck drivers, this is just an illustration!), it's all you have and even though we depressed folk are hauling a ton of garbage, we still have control of what garbage we pick up and when we dump it!

Because we are Depressed, we will be carrying around all this negativity, but you get to dump it out whenever you see fit. You do not have to carry it or deal with the stench of darkness with you forever.

From what I have seen being in this sickness, is that we the sufferers, don't even know that we have the power to conquer it! We are diagnosed, most of the time given drugs, told we have to seek help by way of therapy or councilors/life-coaches/psychologist and so on.

How many of us have been told by the one diagnosing us, what measures we can take to help ourselves?

It's stupid really! It actually pisses me off too!

More than half the battle of depression can be won just by our very own victories over ourselves. The drugs only cover up the problems like cheap makeup on a hooker.

Sounds bad right! Well it is! Our sickness is not being taken care of. Nothing is being done to remedy the root causes of our sickness. It seems like the world cares more about getting points for writing Rx's then for actually putting all those years of school to some real work!

Well guess what? You don't need them anyway!

All you need is some insight, inner-strength, and for a really bad day, maybe a punching bag!

I can't stress enough, how important it is for us that are have Depression, to do absolutely everything possible to lesson the symptoms that we have. When you have tried every mental and emotional way to improve your sickness, the need for drugs or trips to a "mental" hospital we be reduced by so much, it would be astonishing!

Do you know how many people will not commit suicide because they are better able to control their minds and feeling in such a way that they want to live just one more day? Then that one day will come and then they will want to live just one more day, and that mentality will go in a circle. Before they even realize it, they will be have so much control over their Depression that the feeling of death will leave them!

The road to happiness is long and hard but we will want to walk it instead of turning to the dead end(literally). It's just that we were never told that we can conquer this. Now that we know we can and that we have the power to do so, we can start sharpening our tools and our swords to fight this Depression one on one!

We will win! Those who have lost their battle to Depression had no tools or sword so they got lost in the darkness. Consumed by the loneliness and bitter cold. Yet we are here, and now we are aware of what we do to have the victory of it! Depression only wins when we don't put up a fight!

My Depression has kicked my butt, but I'm telling you that getting up right after falling, I've proven that it's no match for me! As long as keep up the fight and not give up, I will win each round!

It knocks me down, the bell rings, I have a break to recover from the blows...the bell rings again, and I knock the son of a bleep out!!!

Depression is your enemy, treat it like so!

Get up, get out of bed or off the couch and take control. Cry and wallow in self pity after you win the fight! Make up excuses after you're done beating the crap out of Depression. Show it that you can't be broken! Depression wants to bring you down and keep you there, it wants you to feel alone, it wants you to have nothing.

Your off days or "lows" is just you in the corner when the bell rings, hurry up and recover, find that inner strength and be ready for the bell to ring again! It's knock out time!

Though for the day:

Depression is not your friend, don't let it in. Draw a line and push it outside it. The moment you give in, you'll find yourself losing that round, don't give in!

Truly Yours

Dr. Nobody

Depression and being a parent.

My kids don't deserve to have to see and feel the effects of Depression, but I had kids so what am I going to do!

Like any parent I would love to be all happy-go-lucky for them all the time, but I can only be that sometimes and not for very long. I have seen though, how if I focus on what I can't do for them the more I'm not going to be able to do for them.

I have to focus on what I can do for them. Like I've said in past posts, I have to take advantage of my good days and make them count!

I have been in such "lows" that I stay in bed and do nothing, or lay on the couch just wanting quiet. My kids will ask when we are going to do something, want to leave and go to the park. Being in that "low", the last thing I want to do is be in public.

It's like I feel ashamed of who I am. I only feel that way when I'm in a "low", but still, I feel like people will find me out! I look sick, dark circles under my eyes, pale skin because I rarely ever get any sun. Not only that but there are all kinds of people who are perfectly happy and smiling, I'd be the one parent there with no emotion on my face. Just the thought of that is depressing!

So I understand how hard it is to interact and distract your children while suffering from Depression.

My children, thankfully, understand when I'm not ok. In fact they are quite caring to my needs! If I'm crying, for whatever reason, they will come to me and hug me and tell me they love me. They of course will ask what is wrong and I tell them that I'm sick right now, they say ok and go find themselves a distraction. Oh how I love them!

I take a lot of bathes, It's very calming for me. One of my kids usually will come and sit by the tub to keep me company. Surprisingly, this time is perfect for bonding because I'm in a very relaxed stress-free state of mind. Anyhow, not too long ago, she was asking why I had been crying earlier. I told her that I'm sick again and that's just what happen with this sickness. I told her that is why I came to take a bath, to feel better. Her response, " But why don't you use that lotion you have...it says Stress Relief?"  It was some lotion form Bath & Body Works that was an aroma therapy lotion! Very cute moment.

It's moments like that, that make being a parent while having Depression, not so bad!

The second most valuable thing in this world that has given a reason to live, are my kids. Yes, at times I have not been the best parent because of the lack of attention and even a bit of love I am not always able to give while in a "low", but I forgive myself because I know that I have done the best that I know how and that is all that one can do. You can't do what you don't know!

Now I'm not saying my kids are neglected by any means, I'm just saying that when I am in a "low" there are lots of moments that I can recall when I could have given them another hug, or said I love them, or been a little more caring when they got a boo boo!

I hate who I am on my off days. Seriously! It's like we have a double personality with Depression. I have seen one of my kids fall and scrape their knee, yet my response to them is so ridiculously slow that I disgust myself for how cold I can be. No emotion at times. It is truly a very sad feeling. Yet, any other day, my child falls and... Tun tun tun! Super Parent to the rescue!!!

So all I can do is keep my awareness that way when my day is off and my children need me, I might be in a daze but still do my best to tune into them. I also will give them projects to do when I'm in a low, so that they have something to do. Seeking support from friends and family is a very good idea too. Ask them to take the kids out for a while. Not only so they don't have to be around the dark atmosphere but also so you don't risk taking out any of your frustrations on them.

Personally I'll get snappy and impatient at times. I do ask them for forgiveness when I have gotten mad at them when I know it's just me. Great thing is, kids happily accept apologies then turn and go find something fun to do!

Thought for the day:

The joys of parenting are great, and although we may be sick at times, children are naturally happy and are more than willing to share that happiness!

Truly Yours

Dr. Nobody

How to cope when you had no control over what happened.

First you need to still realize that you need to use your ME Reflex(mental & emotional) for each and every situation in your life.

You need to do this even more so when you had no control over what has happened. Doing this will help you to not only not take things personally but it will also help you not have to deal with so much unneeded drama.

So if someone says something to you that is very hurtful, you need to dismiss what they are saying almost as soon as the words are coming out of their mouths. As they are talking, tune out what they are saying and start telling yourself that what they are doing is mean, cruel, and immature. Tell yourself as they are still talking, that you don't need their negativity in your life. You don't have time for it and you refuse to make time for it.

You have every right to say nothing. Stand there thinking what I just told you to and as soon as you are done, look that awful person in the face and tell them you don't have time for their crap. Turn and walk away.

If you stay in an attempt to try to defend yourself, you will only be feeding the fire and letting that person get the best of you.

You don't need to justify yourself or prove anybody wrong. You know who you are and what you are worth. If they can't see that and have the need to insult you, they do not deserve to have you in their lives.

As soon as you walk away go and distract yourself with something positive. Whatever makes you happy. As hard as it seems to do this, you will find that finding a distraction immediately will be just what you needed to get over the situation and it will also make the "situation" turn to just a small glitch in your day!

Remember that things are only as important as we make them. Everything that is negative, needs to mean nothing. Positive things are everything because the memory of those positive things is what provides one with hope, inspiration and happiness!

I have learned to do this over the years and because of it I have been able to free myself from so much drama and negativity. Having depression, the chances of an insult really doing some damage is pretty high, so using this ME Reflex has helped me so much. I have started to become immune to the evil in this world.

Practice dismissing a person as they are speaking to you, if it is even the slightest bit negative, and you will start gaining the power that person is loosing!

Thought for the day:

When someone does or says something in an attempt to hurt you, it is just them loosing control, take that control that they are loosing and use it to become the wiser!

Truly Yours

Dr. Nobody

Spirituality and Depression

You know, go back a few decades and we will see how much more pleasant the world was. Why have things changed to much? Granted, some of those changes have been for the better, like medical and technology advances that have not only proven to enhance our lives but even at time save them. As far as the other changes I'm talking about, moral, values, parenting and spirituality, the change for these things has made a turn for the worse!

People are rude, mean, ignorant, selfish and unthankful. It's sickens me to think of how we have come to think that it is ok to behave and live like this.

All the things I mentioned above, stem from one key missing factor. Spirituality.

We have left God. Neglected our relationship with Him. In doing so, we have forgotten what to be thankful for, what love really means and so many other things that we once new or that even came naturally to us. We are so far away from Him that some of us even blame Him for the crap we are living!

He has given us life, yet we see no value in it and us afflicted with Depression even more so. He has offered us a close and personal relationship with Him, Our Creator, yet we find no importance in it. He has given us the greatest tool ever in order to help us survive this wicked world, but how many of us even take to heart what the Bible has to say?

It is so simple, the answer to finding our way through the fog that clouds our path to happiness, get your spirituality back and in no time will you not only feel better but those around you will even be able to feel the love and light that fills your person!

Did you know that the Bible says that God wants you to be close to Him? James 4:8 (He needs to be your best friend)

Did you know that we should have so much love for our neighbors that we should even pray for our enemies? Matthew 5:44 (How much hate could be eliminated if only we would listen)

Did you know having faith will save us? Romans 1:17 (I don't know about you but I want to live!)

Did you know that He has given us a list that will improve our personalities? Galatians 5:22 (Are you telling me people wouldn't be a@#holes anymore!!!!)

Those are just a couple of examples of why this world is so mean and ugly, because we are not heeding the advice! My favorite scripture that God put in there for me is:

Psalms 34:18  "God is close to the brokenhearted; He saves those who are crushed in spirit."

 I found this scripture while crying one day. I felt so alone, cold and lost. The hope for  a brighter tomorrow was absent. I was so deeply sadden that if a train was passing, I would've stood in front of it. There was no train and I was quite far from one so I picked up the Bible instead and told myself that there had to be something helpful in it. Low and behold...I opened it to that very scripture!

I was in such disbelief that I would just happen to find it that I knew that He was helping me! Sure boosted my faith too. To imagine that God cares so much about us that He put these words out there for us so we would know how much He loves us!!!

Read it again. He is close us. He saves us. How would we know that though, if we don't read is Word? I have taken this scripture to heat, and I can't tell you how many times when I'm in a "low" especially, that these words are what ends up pulling me out of that hole! Knowing that He is close to me means that I am not alone. He is saving me from the dark madness that engulfs our lives. I put faith and these words and they have yet to fail me.

The more you embrace you spirituality, the more knowledge and insight you will have over your opponent...Depression.

It's a massive battle of the mind and heart, prepare your spirituality and strengthen it with some of those scriptures above, those are the tools that God has given us to fight with. He guarantees they will work and we can be sure they will because He cannot lie! Titus 1:2

I, for one, know for a fact that I would have committed suicide years ago as a teen, had it not been for having God in my life.  It's not easy coping with the loneliness and darkness of Depression, but having Him in your live will be what eventually saves you!

Thought for the day:

God knows exactly how we feel having to suffer of Depression...Psalms 34:18

Always

Dr. Nobody

How to forgive yourself.

This is so important for your self-esteem. By you not forgiving yourself for something, you are punishing yourself over and over again. You are also not giving yourself a chance to redeem itself.

To error is human, we are not perfect. The mistakes we make is what we learn from. If no one ever made a mistake we would all be hot heads and we would have no value for anything at all.

When a person makes a mistake, they learn how not to do something. Look for a solution to correct it and move on. If the person is particularly savey, they will find various solutions in order to find the most efficient one.

So see your mistakes as opportunities for growth, not for thinking you are worth less.

You would only be an idiot if you kept making the same mistakes repeatedly with no signs of improvement or no signs of repenting if it is a more serious matter.

If God is so ready and willing to forgive you, then there is no excuse for you not forgiving yourself.

Psalms 103:9-12
"He will not always find fault, Nor will he stay resentful forever. He has not dealt with us according to our sins,Nor has he repaid us what our errors deserve.  For as the heavens are higher than the earth, So great is his loyal love toward those who fear him. As far off as the sunrise is from the sunset, So far off from us he has put our transgressions"

Ask God to forgive you for whatever you have done, no matter how big or small. Let him know exactly how you feel and what you have learned from the whole thing.

Once you have done this, it will be a lot easier to start forgiving yourself once you know and understand that God forgives you.

And remember that no one has the right to keep account of your mistakes, if one does, you need to throw them out of your life because as the scripture above states...He doesn't even hold things against you, so no human should!

Thought for the day:

If you are not forgiving yourself for mistakes you've made, you are also not giving yourself a chance to learn and grow.

Truly Yours

Dr. Nobody